That is not a tissue.

The other night I walked into the bathroom where Caleb was just finishing washing his hands.

Except him drying his hands was not what I saw.

Caleb was using the hand towel to blow his nose!

Here I Am To Worship

Every Sunday during the month of August, we sang this song in church.

Everytime it gives me goosebumps, and I have to stop myself from tearing up.

Light of the world

You stepped down into darkness

Opened my eyes, let me see

Beauty that made this heart adore You

Hope of a life spent with You

Here I am to worship

Here I am to bow down

Here I am to say that You're my God

You're altogether lovely

Altogether worthy

Altogether wonderful to me

King of all days

Oh so highly exalted

Glorious in Heaven above

Humbly You came to the earth You created

All for love's sake became poor

I'll never know how much it cost

To see my sin upon that cross

Piece of What?

Remember the friend I shared about yesterday that I threw the worst birthday dinner ever for?

This one.

Well, my smooth moves really come out around her.  It's a good thing she has a great sense of humor and doesn't mind!

I stopped my her desk, and I asked her "Do you want to have a piece of boobie?"

*awkward silence*

Then lots of laughter.

What I MEANT to say was, do you want to have a pizza, beer, and movie night?

You can hear the similarities.  Right?

Worst Birthday Dinner Ever

I have this friend.  She moved to our area about a year and a half ago and became my co worker shortly after.  We've became friends in the last year after we ran the 10K together.  She had a birthday two weeks ago, and we'd planned a birthday dinner of stuffed peppers, mashed potatoes and red velvet cake.

Unfortunately, it happened to be the same week my dad was in the hospital and my father-in-law was in an out of the hospital and the week after my miscarriage.  So we had to reschedule.  And this is the first chance we've had. 

I came home after work already to start the peppers when I realized, I forgot to put the hamburger out to thaw.  

Crap, I don't have anything to stuff the peppers with.

No problem, I'll give her a call and order a pizza!

Crap, the pizza place in town only takes cash.  

I just spent my last bit of cash on butter at the gas station.  And I don't have enough money in my bank account to get cash until pay day.

Well this just keeps getting better.

I was completely unprepared.

Result, my friend ends up bringing her own frozen pizzas over for the birthday dinner we were throwing her, which we ate off paper plates.  

At least I can still make a cake, right!?

In theory, yes.  But it turned out like this.  

That cake looks better on the plate than it did in the pan.  I couldn't even get it onto my cake stand.

It tasted great, but we termed it, the ugly cake. 

On second thought, maybe it's a good thing the stuffed peppers were missing the hamburger.  They probably would have turned out horrible too. 

At least I have adorable kids that distracted us all and provided great entertainment!  Perhaps I'll write more about that later. 

Happy Belated Birthday Friend!

Just Closed

Bitter is the New Black

by Jen Lancaster

I have to admit, she wasn't a very nice person, but I enjoyed the book.  It was an easy read, that came with a lot of humor.  I found myself retelling some of the stories to my husband, who was less amused than I!  The one thing I noticed about the book, is the strong relationship she conveyed between herself and her husband.  It was something I admired about her, despite her gruff personality. 

Murdock's Mama inspired these "Just Closed" posts.  Check out her most recent book over at her website.

You can also follow my reading on GoodReads. 

God Gave Me You - by Blake Shelton

This song, stops me in my tracks every time I hear it. 

It reminds me of my husband and how we blessed we are to have found each other.  

And it is a reminder of the strength we have in our relationship and the ability to handle the ups and downs with God's help.

This song, puts a smile on my face, and makes me want to hug my husband a little extra every day.

Three years ago...

Three years ago today, our world was turned upside down.

At the time, I had no idea it would be one of the best things that ever happened in our family.

God has a way of giving us blessings in disguise, and after we survived through the rough patch, we came out on the other side, stronger, healthier, and in a much better situation than before.

Do I wish it had happened differently?  Hell yes.  I wish those boys had much more calm past, but would I change it?  No.  We haven't let if define us, and I have faith we have overcome it, and will continue to overcome new obstacles, together, as a family. 

Strange Questions

So when I find out I was pregnant, before we knew it was another miscarriage, I called to set up my first appointment with the nurse.

It was quite the experience, as it usually is when trying to schedule and appointment with the Cleveland Clinic.

I'm used to them asking many questions when you're making an appointment, but when I was calling with a pregnancy this, this question caught me by surprise.

It went something to the effect of "is this appointment a result of a work-related injury or accident?"

In my head, my response was: "um, yes, I tripped over a stapler and now I'm knocked-up."

Weeds

The boys have this new friends at school recently, and they have been asking incessantly for him to come play. After weeks of asking they brought home his mom's phone number for me.

Friday, I got the courage to call her.  I've never done this sort of thing before.  They've always played with friends at day care, but never wanted to bring anyone over before.  So I bit the bullet and called.  Fortunately she was just as anxious about it as I was, she'd never been in the situation before either with her son.  I'm feeling better already!

She said he son has been asking the same questions, and when she picks her son up from the day care, my boys have been asking her to come over and play and such.  She said they had told her all about their pumpkins growing in the yard and their swing set and toys.  They are so excited about this!

So we set a play date for next weekend.

After I wrap up the phone call, I go to tell the boys they have a play date next weekend with their friend.  Caden starts telling me all the things he's told his friend and his mom, except that when he describes our house to his friends, it goes more like "our house is the one with the weeds laying in the front yard!"

I thought parents were supposed to embarrass their children, not the other way around!

Fishing

Keith plans on doing some fishing this weekend with some of the guys from work.  The boys aren't very happy with him for two reasons.
Reason #1: Why is daddy fishing for fish?  Daddy should be fishing for alligators.  No, my boys do not watch swamp people.
Reason #2: They don't get to go along.
So since they aren't joining him.  They've created their own version of fishing at home.  As seen below it involved a stick and a jump rope.

Caden caught a Caleb!

Almost

We spent our evening at a county fair about an hour from where we live. 

Before we left, we made sure to get our special ice cream treat and support the dairy industry!

Caden had a milkshake; Caleb had a dish of ice cream.

Caleb shared his dish of ice cream with me; mainly because he needed help with the plastic spoon and hard dip ice cream and I took a few bites as payment for assisting. 

As I' tucked Caden into bed tonight, he says "Mommy, I was almost going to share my milkshake with you. *pause* But then I kept it in the backseat with me."

Oh wow, that was almost so thoughtful of you.  But it makes me smile anyway. 

We sure are an ice cream loving family. 

I was raised in the dairy industry, and I've never felt guilty for eating ice cream and supporting the dairy farmers!  If I'm eating it for a good cause, that at least cuts the calories in half, right?

Like a Cowboy

Caden came in today with what used to be a jump rope.
"Mom look! I made it like a cowboy!"
A lasso made by Caden.

A Bear for Mommy

The other day Caleb found a bear he thought I should have. He thought I needed it to go to bed with it that night.

He thought it was so important in fact, that he placed the bear perfectly at my pillow on my side of the bead, just waiting for me to join it that night.

He's such a sweetheart!

The Second Time Around

On January 16, 2010, I peed on a stick for the first time in my life.  A positive result for us!  Exactly 1.5 years later, July 16, 2011, I did it again.  Another positive result!

Unfortunately, this pregnancy ended with the same fate as our first.

This past Sunday, I noticed that something wasn't right.  After spending the afternoon in the emergency room and a follow up appointment on Monday, the confirmed, what I already knew.  That we were having a miscarriage. 

The second time around isn't any easier.  I knew a little bit more about what to expect from my body, but it still isn't any easier. I haven't gone back to work yet, and the thought of it isn't coming easy.

I started blogging, because of my first experience, and I'm back here again, blogging about it again.  Looking back at that first post of mine.  I can certainly say the answer to that question is yes. 

We didn't tell anyone this time around.  And if you know me in real life and are reading this, I'd prefer you keep it that way please.  If that's our desire, why write this post?  Because there is a part of me that needs put it out there, to process, to remember and move on. 

I don't want to talk about it.  I just want to be sad for awhile.  

Just Closed

The book was a quick easy read, with some entertainment, but mostly I was looking forward to finishing it so I could move on to another book!

Clean Underwear = Pee in Pants

Me: Go get ready for showers please boys.

Caden: Oh good, I need clean underwear because I peed them a little.

Me: Why did you do that?

Caden: Because we get clean underwear tonight, so I just peed them a little.

Me: That does not make it alright to pee your pants. 

Caden walks away to get ready for showers.  I shake my head in frustration of my 5 year old peeing in his pants.  Husband laughs.  Husband justifies his laughing by stating that in his mind clean underwear is a logical reason to pee your pants.

I can't decide which I'm more frustrated with, peeing in his pants, or peeing in the trash can next to the toilet in the bathroom. 

On second thought, I'd rather he pee his pants.  I hate cleaning out the trash after he's peed in it.

He's such a rebel.