Wednesday, August 03, 2011

The Second Time Around

On January 16, 2010, I peed on a stick for the first time in my life.  A positive result for us!  Exactly 1.5 years later, July 16, 2011, I did it again.  Another positive result!

Unfortunately, this pregnancy ended with the same fate as our first.

This past Sunday, I noticed that something wasn't right.  After spending the afternoon in the emergency room and a follow up appointment on Monday, the confirmed, what I already knew.  That we were having a miscarriage. 

The second time around isn't any easier.  I knew a little bit more about what to expect from my body, but it still isn't any easier. I haven't gone back to work yet, and the thought of it isn't coming easy.

I started blogging, because of my first experience, and I'm back here again, blogging about it again.  Looking back at that first post of mine.  I can certainly say the answer to that question is yes. 

We didn't tell anyone this time around.  And if you know me in real life and are reading this, I'd prefer you keep it that way please.  If that's our desire, why write this post?  Because there is a part of me that needs put it out there, to process, to remember and move on. 

I don't want to talk about it.  I just want to be sad for awhile.  

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