Saturday, February 27, 2010

"Daddy, don't make a mess; I saw you!"

Daddy and Muffin are in the kitchen making pancakes for breakfast for the family.  As I'm doing some things in the living room I head Muffin yelling at Daddy.  "Daddy quit making a mess!"  No response from Daddy.  "Daddy, don't make a mess!  I saw you do it!"

As our boys have really started understanding the rules of the house, well, they've become the "police" of their own rules too!  Not only are they constantly telling each other what to do and tattling, they're sure to let both Hubby and I know when we've done something we shouldn't!  (Really it's mostly Daddy.  I mean really, mommy doesn't mess up right!?)

Along with policing has come helping!  They LOVE to help with things, as Muffin is now doing with Daddy and the Bisquick pancakes we're about to have for breakfast.  :)

Happy snowy Saturday all!

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Do you let your kids see you cry?

I have thought about this question off and on at different times.  And I'm a full believer that some discretion is always required, but I also believe that there as some instances where you don't have to hide your real feelings from your children.  I've been caught a few times starting to cry in front of my boys.  They're 3 1/2 now, and they know when something is really upsetting you.  As I mentioned, I don't think you always have to censor yourself in front of your kids.  After all we want them to know we're human too don't we?  I comfort them when they cry and do my best to teach them to control their emotions when necessary, but not to hide them.

The point here is that I don't think my husband and I agree on this point.  Any time I'm close to tears and the boys are near, he quiets me to tell them not to let the boys see me cry.  It's not something we talk about or discuss, mainly because it doesn't happen often enough to become a big issue.  I hope in the future it never becomes an issue.

It's been on my mind more lately.  Mainly because there has been more tears than usual in my house lately. After all, loosing a baby has had a big impact on our lives.  We never told our boys we were expecting.  We were waiting on the a-ok from the doctor before sharing the big news, and when that never came, we never broke the news to them.  The Baby on the Way book that I had bought to help the boys understand the arrival of their new sibling has been sent to the basement.  After all, how do you explain to a couple of three year old boys that they lost a baby sibling?  They can't understand that, but at the same time, they know that things changed in our house.  The know that mommy hasn't felt well, and that daddy has been doing all the housework.  I don't know what the right thing for them is with this.  I keep thinking that all will be back to normal soon, and we can have a special weekend with them to celebrate the joyful life we have as a family.  Unfortunately issues keep popping up and it keeps dragging on longer than we anticipated (but that's another story), but with spring coming around the corner, I'm excited for a spring and another summer with my family in our new home. 

I do love my family & friends.  :)  I'd be crazy without them!

Monday, February 22, 2010

Parenting Quote of the Day

Living with children is like living in a frat house, the place is a mess, nobody gets enough sleep, and sooner or later someones going to throw up. ~ Ray Romano

A Weekend of New Beginnings of Sorts & BAKING!

This past weekend was the first weekend in maybe a month it seems that life in our house may return to normal afterall!  After a rocky month of ups and downs, we finally got back to a more normal routine over the weekend.  As it is never ending we spent most of Saturday cleaning, doing laundry, and I started baking again!  Before kids I LOVED to bake, and did it quite frequently.  It happens much less often, but I still enjoy it! 

After the kids got up from their too short Saturday afternoon nap, we started baking!  Baking with our Kitchenaid mixer is WONDERFUL might I add!  (Thanks Mom!)  We started with a mayonaise cake, which at first hubby REFUSED to let me make saying it would be disgusting.  Well, I refuse to be told what I can and cannot bake!  So I baked it!  I also looked up a recipie for brown sugar frosting to top the cake.  Both of these items are things that 1: I never hear about, and 2: I've never made before!  It turns out the cake is AWESOME!  :) 

Hubby insisted I then make so no-bake cookies, which I protested, but caved in thinking about how simple they are to make.  Unfortunatley I didn't think ahead when making the recipie!  The mayo cake and frosting was simple, throw ingredients in and mix.  So I started to do the same with the no-bake cookies forgetting the chocolaty concotion has to boil!  Opps!  Luckily I caught on before I did TOO much damage.  I added the peanut butter prematurely, and it had to boil with the chocolate.  The cookies taste delicious still, but they're a bit harder and more crumbly than usualy due to the slight mistake in preparation!

Finally I baked Mississippi Mud.  This is a recipie my mom gave me that had belonged to my Grandma Bechtel.  She passed away in the early 1970s, and I never had the opportunity to meet her, but I imagine she was a wonderful person that we would have gotten along with well.  My mom had the recipie becuase this was one of my dad's favorite desserts that his mom used to make.  Having tried to please my dad in making one of her recipies before (lemon sponge pie) I learned I don't always get it right the first time.  I thought I'd try it once BEFORE making it for dad just as a trial run.  The lemon sponge pie turned out awful.  (Lucky for me all dad had to say was that I should try again!)  Luckily, the Mississippi Mud has received compliments so far!  We took it to the in-laws with us yesterday, and it was a hit!  Although my three year olds weren't fans!  Perhaps we'll try again for Dad when he returns from the great state of Wyoming on his snowmobiling vacation!  He's the only one who'll be able to tell us if it's like Grandma's or not!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Go watch a movie in the other room please Mommy.

Tater Tot & Muffin are curled up on the chair & couch in the small living room watching Shrek.  They started watching Hercules, but Muffin came running to me in the other room because there was a monster on the tv and it was scary!  So Shrek it became.  I walking in to see them and see how the movie was and Tater Tot looks at me and says "go watch a movie in the other room mommy."

It's a never ending adventure in our house with two three year old boys running around and using their wild imaginations!  I hope as they grow they maintain that sense of fun, creativity, and imagination!  Hopefully it leads to life of happiness and success for them!

You're going to turn into a monster!

Tonight at the dinner table, Muffin proudly told me "You're going to turn into a MONSTER Wednesday, and you'll have to go outside in a cage."  It was complete with hand motions and everything!  Then the two of them decided that they were going to talk about how I would be as a monster.  I was going to bite and make these faces with my arms above my head waving frantically.

Where do they get their imaginations!?

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Mommy, thank you for showering.

This morning as hubby, kids, and I were leaving for work, Muffrin gives me his goodbye hug and kiss and says "Thank you for taking a shower."  Ummmm, "You're welcome?"  We try very hard to teach our children manners, but so far discretion about thoughts hasn't had any luck sticking.  I mean they are only three, and I am mom, but this isn't the first time this week that he's made a comment about my bathing habits.  Monday as hubby and kids were leaving and I was curled up on the couch for a sick day, Muffin hugs me goodbye and says "Mommy, please take a shower today."  Well, ok, thanks for the tip!  Now I shower daily, and I've always thought I take decent care of myself, but apparently my 3 year old doesn't approve.  It's not unusul and bedtime for hugs and goodnights to include a good "Mommy, you stink!" 

Now I realize things in our home haven't exactly been normal for the last month considering all the other circumstances.  Our maybe baby changed a lot of things in my house for the short time it was around, and roles have shifted as I am still recovering and healing.  (Hopefully my body stops hating me soon!)  The cutest things out of it, aside from the bluntly speaking about my hygeine!, is that the boys have started having a real desire to help, with everthing, whether they can actually be helpful or not!  They were helping daddy pack his lunch for work earlier this week, when the nex thing I know is that the lunch box is tipped over and packed items covering our kitchen floor!  Daddy's been such a trooper!  Hopefully their helpfullness outlasts this short period of disorganization in our house!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Can you call it a loss if it never really was?

A month ago today I took my first pregnancy test ever, and surprise, positive!  Hubby's and my excitement rose and we starting thinking about what a new future might be like with a third little one running around, we were increasingly excited about our future.

I went to the first appointment where they gather all your family histories and medical histories etc. solo.  We got a tentative due date, September 7, and things started seeming even more real!  We couldn't have a definite due date since I didn't know the date of my last cycle.

The following week we went in for our 8 week appointment together with excitement and anxiousness to know everything was alright and to get a better idea how far along we might be.  It turned out to be something we never imagined.  At that first appointment, we were given a few possibilities.  1: Perhaps we're only at maybe 6 weeks instead of the predicted 8.  Option 2: Blighted Ovum.

Then started the seemingly endless blood tests and ultrasounds and doctors appointments.  In a matter of days we were hearing what we'd hoped and prayed was not the case.  Ultimately, my hormone levels weren't increasing as they should with a normal pregnancy, and after testing and re-testing the results stayed the same.  There was never any fetal development.  The sac was there as expected with a pregnancy, but there was never any further development.

After waiting for a couple of weeks to pass it on my own, we decided the wait was too much.  We scheduled a D&C for this past Friday.  Although that is complete, my body has not returned to it's normal state.  And emotions are still running high in our house.  I know we're making progress and moving forward, but we're still dealing with a loss of something we had been so excited about and loved.  But in a physical sense, it isn't a loss if it never really was.  To me the loss is still very real.  For me, it's something that will never be forgotten, and when the time is right and God decides, maybe we will have another one running around with our amazing twin boys.  Until then, we deal with it, live, and continue to look forward to the future.  The best is yet to come.