With this week marking my return to work, my husband offered some perspective that made it easier; don't get me wrong, it was still hard.
As we were talking about my return to work the day before, he provided some things to think about I hadn't really considered.
I was sharing how sometimes I thought I was selfish for wanting more money for our family and things when I could be cutting way back and spending my days with my kids. While I would love to, Keith made the point that the money I bring in helps us to have opportunities not only now, but for the future.
My additional income allows for us to plan to help our children pay for college, which is something important to me. It helps us save for retirement. It provides us additional security and savings we wouldn't be able to afford without me working.
Seeing how having too little money later in life can impact families I'm more confident in my choice to go back to work.
And helping our kids through college is something I find very important too, and me working will give us more options to help them.
I've prayed a lot about returning to work, and I have faith we're making a good choice.
Friday, September 28, 2012
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Returning to Work
As I return to work today, I want to reflect more on some things about myself.
I've grown in my faith during my maternity leave, but it's something I hope to continue to grow once I return to work, but it will be harder.
I've realized I don't always like who I am when I'm working. I've not always carried the best attitude with me about work. It's easy to get frustrated and angry with the days happenings and tasks, and I let them bring me down. I can get caught up in the complaining and gossip. It's time that can certainly be better focused and more positive.
As I return to work, my goal is to like who i am at work too, and that will mean making some changes, mostly to my attitude.
The other thing about returning to work will be keeping up with my household chores and focusing on the kids before their bedtime. It's easy to be tired and cranky when i get home from work, but I need to make my drive home about letting go of work and focusing on family time to make that time of higher quality. That limited time with my kids is precious and I don't want to waste it being grumpy and tired from work.
I know I'll have days where tiredness, complaining and grumpiness will get the best of me, but I want to do better. I've seen how good it can be now that I've spent 12 weeks at home, so why should my attitude and dedication change because I'm working again? The simple point, it shouldn't. I can change my attitude, and I plan to do just that.
I've grown in my faith during my maternity leave, but it's something I hope to continue to grow once I return to work, but it will be harder.
I've realized I don't always like who I am when I'm working. I've not always carried the best attitude with me about work. It's easy to get frustrated and angry with the days happenings and tasks, and I let them bring me down. I can get caught up in the complaining and gossip. It's time that can certainly be better focused and more positive.
As I return to work, my goal is to like who i am at work too, and that will mean making some changes, mostly to my attitude.
The other thing about returning to work will be keeping up with my household chores and focusing on the kids before their bedtime. It's easy to be tired and cranky when i get home from work, but I need to make my drive home about letting go of work and focusing on family time to make that time of higher quality. That limited time with my kids is precious and I don't want to waste it being grumpy and tired from work.
I know I'll have days where tiredness, complaining and grumpiness will get the best of me, but I want to do better. I've seen how good it can be now that I've spent 12 weeks at home, so why should my attitude and dedication change because I'm working again? The simple point, it shouldn't. I can change my attitude, and I plan to do just that.
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
3rd Anniverary
Keith and I have been together for 5 years, and today we are celebrating 3 years of marriage.
It was supposed to be my first day back to work after maternity leave. However, we've never worked on our anniversary. We take a vacation day to spend it together, which I something I plan to continue every year. Our marriage is something to be celebrated!
This year we'll be spending it with our kids and a lunch out together.
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| August 2007 - The first photo of us together. |
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| September 2007 - The first trip Keith made to visit me at College. |
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| Spring Break 2007 - England |
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| Graduation 2008 |
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| Summer 2008 |
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| May 2009 |
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| September 2009 - Our wedding day. |
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| September 2009 - Our honeymoon. |
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| May 2010 |
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| Thanksgiving 2010 |
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| May 2011 - Walt Disney World |
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| Easter 2012 |
I love you Keith. I'm looking forward to many more anniversaries and adventures with you.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Maternity Leave
My 12 weeks of leave was not long enough, not even close.
I'm not a big dreamer. I have visions of the future of how things will be. I focus on reality, and while I hopes of how things turn out, I don't have concrete plans. God has a plan, and his will always trump mine anyway. My pregnancy was no different. I couldn't imagine life with a baby and the boys, but not that I have these three precious kiddos, I couldn't imagine my life without them.
Maternity leave taught me a lot about myself.
I can accomplish a lot if I put my mind to it. I've never been very good at sitting still, even in school I was always busy and participating in lots of extra curricular activities. Not that I'm an adult, I still keep busy all the time, the activities have just changed. I have a very difficult time resting if I know there are dishes to be done and laundry to be done or trash, you name it. I try to go to bed every night with the house picked up and mostly in order. I think this will be a big help to get us all out the door on time in the mornings!
My faith has really grown over my time on maternity leave too. Since I've taken on a role in our church that requires me to be there every Sunday, we've been much better at getting out the door every Sunday morning. I'm glad we're doing it. It's something I'd always tried for, but it was so easy to let the devil sneak in and allow us to be lazy on Sunday mornings. That is no longer an option. And with Keith working lots of Sunday mornings this summer, I've been managing to get the three kids to church solo. I've started reading a devotional and the recommended selections from the Bible. I'd like to say I'm committed to it every day, but I haven't managed that yet. But a few times a week I'm spending time with my Bible and reading, and that is good for my soul.
I've learned a lot about my husband too. His experience with a baby this time around is much different than his baby experience with Caden and Caleb. When I was pregnant I found comfort in knowing he'd done this before, but there were so many things that we both felt like we didn't know what we were doing! Keith doesn't like to stay home for long periods of time. He gets antsy if he doesn't leave the house for a whole day. I on the other hand, could stay at home for days and not mind at all. I suppose in that matter he's good for me; maybe I won't become a hermit this way! But the most important thing I've learned about my husband, he loves us. It's been amazing to see him grow and expand welcoming Elinore into our family and developing that bond. As a daughter, who is a Daddy's girl, I hope for nothing less than that wonderful relationship between Elinore and her Daddy.
I've learned a bit about our marriage too. I admit, I was somewhat naive about how having a baby would impact our marriage. I mean we already had kids and were raising them; we already had established a lot of our thoughts on parenting and discipline, etc. so we shouldn't have to figure that out again. While that may still all be true, the things we've learned about our parenting style are not yet relevant to our sweet little Elinore. Our style focuses on older kids, and boys; I think we'll be making some adjustment to our little girl's personality too. While we disagree about some things, we're working them out and getting along just fine. I now have a better understanding why I've read so much about continuing to focus on your marriage after children, and I am very conscious of that in our actions. It's something we talk about together and something I hope continues, 'til death do us part.
I've learned a lot about being a mom to Caden and Caleb. I've learned to include them in as much as I can with Elinore. They love their sister and are very interested in what she's doing and what she can do at this age. I learned to plan an activity for them each day, it can be something simple, a tent for the swing set fort, baking cookies, coloring a picture for someone, just so long as there is something in the day they can look forward to doing. That has helped us all for the days they are home all day. They weren't used to be home without our kids around them and things to do all day when they stayed home with us for the summer. They are growing and learning and I loved being able to see more of that as they spent the time home with us before kindergarten started.
I've learned kindergarten was a bit adjustment for Caden and Caleb, and Keith and I too. It is one adjustment I think we're still working through. One that will probably take us longer with my transition back to work as well.
I think it goes without saying I've learned a lot about babies. I'm so glad I've found the blogging world and so many websites to read about things. I'm constantly reading to learn more about different people's opinions and studies about raising children. I love the availability to it and the flexibility it affords us to pick and choose what methods we want to use for our family.
And of course, I've gotten to know Elinore. I know my baby, and I know it's going to be hard to leave her later this week when I go back to work. Your first day at the babysitters will be another first for your baby book.
I'm not a big dreamer. I have visions of the future of how things will be. I focus on reality, and while I hopes of how things turn out, I don't have concrete plans. God has a plan, and his will always trump mine anyway. My pregnancy was no different. I couldn't imagine life with a baby and the boys, but not that I have these three precious kiddos, I couldn't imagine my life without them.
Maternity leave taught me a lot about myself.
I can accomplish a lot if I put my mind to it. I've never been very good at sitting still, even in school I was always busy and participating in lots of extra curricular activities. Not that I'm an adult, I still keep busy all the time, the activities have just changed. I have a very difficult time resting if I know there are dishes to be done and laundry to be done or trash, you name it. I try to go to bed every night with the house picked up and mostly in order. I think this will be a big help to get us all out the door on time in the mornings!
My faith has really grown over my time on maternity leave too. Since I've taken on a role in our church that requires me to be there every Sunday, we've been much better at getting out the door every Sunday morning. I'm glad we're doing it. It's something I'd always tried for, but it was so easy to let the devil sneak in and allow us to be lazy on Sunday mornings. That is no longer an option. And with Keith working lots of Sunday mornings this summer, I've been managing to get the three kids to church solo. I've started reading a devotional and the recommended selections from the Bible. I'd like to say I'm committed to it every day, but I haven't managed that yet. But a few times a week I'm spending time with my Bible and reading, and that is good for my soul.
I've learned a lot about my husband too. His experience with a baby this time around is much different than his baby experience with Caden and Caleb. When I was pregnant I found comfort in knowing he'd done this before, but there were so many things that we both felt like we didn't know what we were doing! Keith doesn't like to stay home for long periods of time. He gets antsy if he doesn't leave the house for a whole day. I on the other hand, could stay at home for days and not mind at all. I suppose in that matter he's good for me; maybe I won't become a hermit this way! But the most important thing I've learned about my husband, he loves us. It's been amazing to see him grow and expand welcoming Elinore into our family and developing that bond. As a daughter, who is a Daddy's girl, I hope for nothing less than that wonderful relationship between Elinore and her Daddy.
I've learned a bit about our marriage too. I admit, I was somewhat naive about how having a baby would impact our marriage. I mean we already had kids and were raising them; we already had established a lot of our thoughts on parenting and discipline, etc. so we shouldn't have to figure that out again. While that may still all be true, the things we've learned about our parenting style are not yet relevant to our sweet little Elinore. Our style focuses on older kids, and boys; I think we'll be making some adjustment to our little girl's personality too. While we disagree about some things, we're working them out and getting along just fine. I now have a better understanding why I've read so much about continuing to focus on your marriage after children, and I am very conscious of that in our actions. It's something we talk about together and something I hope continues, 'til death do us part.
I've learned a lot about being a mom to Caden and Caleb. I've learned to include them in as much as I can with Elinore. They love their sister and are very interested in what she's doing and what she can do at this age. I learned to plan an activity for them each day, it can be something simple, a tent for the swing set fort, baking cookies, coloring a picture for someone, just so long as there is something in the day they can look forward to doing. That has helped us all for the days they are home all day. They weren't used to be home without our kids around them and things to do all day when they stayed home with us for the summer. They are growing and learning and I loved being able to see more of that as they spent the time home with us before kindergarten started.
I've learned kindergarten was a bit adjustment for Caden and Caleb, and Keith and I too. It is one adjustment I think we're still working through. One that will probably take us longer with my transition back to work as well.
I think it goes without saying I've learned a lot about babies. I'm so glad I've found the blogging world and so many websites to read about things. I'm constantly reading to learn more about different people's opinions and studies about raising children. I love the availability to it and the flexibility it affords us to pick and choose what methods we want to use for our family.
And of course, I've gotten to know Elinore. I know my baby, and I know it's going to be hard to leave her later this week when I go back to work. Your first day at the babysitters will be another first for your baby book.
Monday, September 24, 2012
Why didn't you tell us that?
The boys are inquisitive as ever. The questions never stop. The older they get the harder the questions get. So hard in fact there are questions daily I can't answer. For example, one day they asked me, "how do they make paint?" When I thought for a bit and answered with a "they mix some chemicals together and put it in a can" it wasn't good enough for them. What kind of chemicals? How do they mix them? And on and on.
I love that they want to learn, but man, I'm having to Google things all the time. The only problem is I can't Google and drive, which is when most of the questions arise. Usually it's something like "what's that thing over there?" Which also means, I usually have no idea what they're talking about. I certainly can't peel my eyes off the road to look around for everything they might possibly ask about. Yet when I ask for more detail about what they're pointing at, I usually get an annoyed, "that's thing mom!" In my head I hear them finish that off with, "duh mom." (I'm sure one of these days it will happen for real.
The other thing that tends to happen is they get an answer that they really like to their question. Then they get upset with us for not having told them sooner. Usually it comes with a "why didn't you tell us that!?" In a how could you have kept this from us!
For example when they told me, I wish we had pine cone trees in our yard, and I answered that we did, they decided they wanted two of them. I proceeded to tell them about the half dozen pine trees in various places in our yard. My explanation was met with a "why didn't you tell me that?!"
I had no idea it was so important to tell you! Clearly, my children think I'm keeping secrets from them. Including about the pine trees in our yard.
I love that they want to learn, but man, I'm having to Google things all the time. The only problem is I can't Google and drive, which is when most of the questions arise. Usually it's something like "what's that thing over there?" Which also means, I usually have no idea what they're talking about. I certainly can't peel my eyes off the road to look around for everything they might possibly ask about. Yet when I ask for more detail about what they're pointing at, I usually get an annoyed, "that's thing mom!" In my head I hear them finish that off with, "duh mom." (I'm sure one of these days it will happen for real.
The other thing that tends to happen is they get an answer that they really like to their question. Then they get upset with us for not having told them sooner. Usually it comes with a "why didn't you tell us that!?" In a how could you have kept this from us!
For example when they told me, I wish we had pine cone trees in our yard, and I answered that we did, they decided they wanted two of them. I proceeded to tell them about the half dozen pine trees in various places in our yard. My explanation was met with a "why didn't you tell me that?!"
I had no idea it was so important to tell you! Clearly, my children think I'm keeping secrets from them. Including about the pine trees in our yard.
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Thumbs and Pacifiers
Since very early in your life Ellie, you'd liked your hands near your face. We often hear you sucking on your hands and various fingers.
We waited a long time to introduce a pacifier due to breastfeeding, and when it was brought up, usually by Daddy, I was against it. Although as you've grown, and breastfeeding was well established, I've been considering it.
You see, you're commonly with your hands or fingers in your mouth still, and just in the last day or so you've found your thumb.
While I'm not excited about that discovery, I'm proud of you for figuring it out, and finding something that comforts you.
I'd rather have you take a pacifier than your thumb. You see, we can take the pacifier away, but we can't take your thumb away.
Over the last few weeks I've tried the pacifier with you and most of the time you're not interested. We have 3 or 4 different kinds of pacifiers, and I've had the most success with two of them, which happen to be identical. Even when you do take the pacifier, you don't keep it for long.
I'm sure there will be more to come on the thumb and pacifier front, but now I think I'm comfortable no matter which way you decide to go and we'll leave both options there for you.
We love you Ellie.
We waited a long time to introduce a pacifier due to breastfeeding, and when it was brought up, usually by Daddy, I was against it. Although as you've grown, and breastfeeding was well established, I've been considering it.
You see, you're commonly with your hands or fingers in your mouth still, and just in the last day or so you've found your thumb.
While I'm not excited about that discovery, I'm proud of you for figuring it out, and finding something that comforts you.
I'd rather have you take a pacifier than your thumb. You see, we can take the pacifier away, but we can't take your thumb away.
Over the last few weeks I've tried the pacifier with you and most of the time you're not interested. We have 3 or 4 different kinds of pacifiers, and I've had the most success with two of them, which happen to be identical. Even when you do take the pacifier, you don't keep it for long.
I'm sure there will be more to come on the thumb and pacifier front, but now I think I'm comfortable no matter which way you decide to go and we'll leave both options there for you.
We love you Ellie.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
Elinore's Two Month Check-up & Flu Shots
Caden, Caleb and I took Elinore in for her two-month check-up this morning.
We were seeing the nurse practitioner today instead of our regular pediatrician, and I really liked her. Elinore checked out well and is growing right on track in about the 15th percentile for her height and weight. You are growing!
She weighed in at 10 lbs. 8 oz. She's 22 1/4 inches long.
She cried through her vaccinations, all 3 of them. She was experienced with the oral medication, so she did well with that one! Afterwards it took some time to calm her back down, and after her screaming slowed to a whimper I nursed her, and she went right to sleep.
You'll find me snuggled with my baby the rest of the day from those tears and shots. I think she's doing just fine though after a long nap and another nursing session, she's full of normal smiles and wiggling all over the blanket next to me! That sure makes it easier on mommy!
While we were there they also had this year's flu vaccinations in and recommended them for everyone else in the house since Elinore isn't old enough for one. Since today was an off day for kindergarten with the boys, they were with me, so they had their flu shots today too.
Caden was able to have the mist so he was happy.
Caleb on the other hand required the shot. Since he had an inhaler and some respiratory illness this spring he wasn't able to have the mist. He was not so happy with me. As they were listening to us talk, I started getting some not so nice looks from the boys about vaccinations. When I told Caleb needed a shot today he was upset.
The boys asked if they needed shots like Elinore on our way to the doctor's office. I said no. While that turned out to be a bit of a lie, I think it helped Caleb not having to think about it and get really anxious for it. We made sure he was first so he didn't have to worry about it for too long. I held his hands and it was over so quickly. He felt much better about it afterwards and was right back to normal!
We were seeing the nurse practitioner today instead of our regular pediatrician, and I really liked her. Elinore checked out well and is growing right on track in about the 15th percentile for her height and weight. You are growing!
She weighed in at 10 lbs. 8 oz. She's 22 1/4 inches long.
She cried through her vaccinations, all 3 of them. She was experienced with the oral medication, so she did well with that one! Afterwards it took some time to calm her back down, and after her screaming slowed to a whimper I nursed her, and she went right to sleep.
You'll find me snuggled with my baby the rest of the day from those tears and shots. I think she's doing just fine though after a long nap and another nursing session, she's full of normal smiles and wiggling all over the blanket next to me! That sure makes it easier on mommy!
While we were there they also had this year's flu vaccinations in and recommended them for everyone else in the house since Elinore isn't old enough for one. Since today was an off day for kindergarten with the boys, they were with me, so they had their flu shots today too.
Caden was able to have the mist so he was happy.
Caleb on the other hand required the shot. Since he had an inhaler and some respiratory illness this spring he wasn't able to have the mist. He was not so happy with me. As they were listening to us talk, I started getting some not so nice looks from the boys about vaccinations. When I told Caleb needed a shot today he was upset.
The boys asked if they needed shots like Elinore on our way to the doctor's office. I said no. While that turned out to be a bit of a lie, I think it helped Caleb not having to think about it and get really anxious for it. We made sure he was first so he didn't have to worry about it for too long. I held his hands and it was over so quickly. He felt much better about it afterwards and was right back to normal!
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